The MARCH April Harrison's Friend of the Month Award and all the rights and privleges that go along with it, is given on this day, March 1st, 2001, to Mr. Daniel Edge, of Huxley, Iowa.

Daniel and I met in the beginning of our sophomore year at NCSU. We were both rushing Phi Sigma Pi Co-ed Fraternity, and I was having a panic attack prior to giving a speech about myself in front of the entire fraternity, so I was talking to anyone who would pity me. In came Daniel. He calmed me down the best he could and after we both gave out speeches, we walked back to the dorms together, then decided to continue on to Vegas and elope later that night in the Hubba Hubba Elvis Chapel 'O Love. After we received all the items on our wedding registry, we thought it best to anoll the marriage, but we were able to remain friends. Daniel then easily and graciously fell into the role of perma-date for all fraternity social functions.

Some of Daniel's hobbies include adopting new pets at least once a week, crashing into ambulances at intersections, ignoring his cat's litter box smell until it becomes unbearable, making fun of his friends mommas and falling down the stairs simultaneously, performing eye rinses at semi-formals, making illegal left turns across 4 lanes of counter traffic, praying that no more of his animals fall out his windows to the ground below, travelling to exotic locales just for the cheap beer, grossing out his friends with animal facts he learned in vet school and humoring my mom's olive gifts.

Some of our common interests include holding trials for the NCSU Orgy Club, watching Dawson's Creek, gossiping about any and everyone, sleeping late, wasting precious cell phone minutes watching long distance TV together, tasting flavored body paints, eating chocolate pound cake, attemping to converse in spanish without either of us excelling at foreign language recall, playing Produce Codes Memory while working at Kroger, driving around D.C. for hours on end trying to find M street, eating at Crackel Barrel - cause if you love home cooking...., spending way too much money shopping and convincing the other to do the same, road trips, writing Haiki, visiting South of the Border and downloading everything possible from Napster.

Daniel won this award for many reasons. To begin, he neared a perfect 10 in the application process by correctly submitting that I was enticing, fascinating, fun, gorgeous, hot, intelligent, sexy AND thrilling, that I was so cool and that he thinks about me 10+ times a day (while agreeing with Brian regarding the need for an 'Every waking moment' option). When asked on the application form why he should win this award, he bullshitted the following:

"I guess I could just say that ever since that first day that I saw you in your flowery blue skirt at the Phi Sigma Pi interviews I knew that you had to be the most unique, introspective, alarmingly intelligent, kind, generous, funky freaky cool, and effortlessly enlightened individual that I had ever encountered. And, yes, those expectations were never unsurpassed by your inexplicable sense of wisdom and coolness. It is with all of my heart and mind that I treasure the friendship that we have held. I call you more than any other person over the silliest of things ("Hey April, Dawson is on Rosie!!!") and it is with you that I can spend an entire afternoon talking on the phone about the same tv show/movie/talk show while wasting away precious cellular phone minutes. But to me that is no waste of money or time. Furthermore, no other friend of yours has such a sexy and incredibly irresistable nose as mine! Si, tengo el nariz que es tu favorito, no?! April, you are the complete definition of friendship. Yours forever in bound friendship....Daniel :P
PS.Supplemental application information: I am eternally grateful for you introducing me to the wonders of Target, Old Navy, and the salsa drenched taco salad at El Rodeo!!! Viva la burrita!"

Also like Brian, Daniel had a written application submitted on his behalf from his good friends Bono and The Edge, but took it even further by mailing numerous letters from various other music and movie stars including Dave Barry, Maya Angelou, Michael Thomas Ford, Dick Sack, Salvador Dali, Brad Pitt, Barenaked Ladies, Dave Matthews, Iowa citizens, Norm McDonald, Liam Gallagher and Katie Holmes as Joey Potter. While losing points for creativity by stealing the idea from Brian, he definately wins points for postage spent. He also mailed me a bribe...I mean, care package, full of items from my list of favorites, including Little Debbie Oatmeal Pies, Aleve, Blistex and Carmex lip balm, a mirror ball, Extra gum (dark blue), a book of crossword puzzles, doggie stickers and a framed picture of me with HOT! written in glitter on the side. That may have taken it a bit far, but as Ferris Buhler wisely says "A.) You can never go too far."

While Dan has made some friendship no-no's in the past, such as ratting me out to an RA and working full-time every night during my trip to Iowa to see him, he makes up for it by such actions as graciously giving me the U2 poster that came with his Best Of U2 CD, letting me drive his nice cars around town and listening to me bitch when I need to.

Click here to see pictures of Dan and I having fun.

Congrats, Dan, on this award. Don't wet yourself in excitement. And this DOESN'T mean you necessarily have to stop sending me presents.

If you are jealous of Daniel's award, make sure to submit your own application now by clicking here. Remember, whomever wins next month's award will inherently win the coveted April Squared Award, that being the April's April Harrison Friend of the Month Award. Can life get any better?